Sadness

In the blink of an eye, your whole world can change and come crashing down around you. Last Wednesday I was happily enjoying designing my card for next Card Party in Pullman when my Cell rang. It was my Father. He never calls so I knew it wasn't good. I expected bad news about either my Mother or her brother, Sylvester. No, it wasn't. My double cousin Michael had been found dead. I sort of stopped breathing for a bit. Michael? My Birthday baby born 12 years after me and whose toes I pinched so he would wake up and I could hold him? That Michael?

All I could do is see a happy little boy who wanted to be totally and unconditionally loved by everyone; A little boy whose eyes sparkled when he saw the Christmas presents under the tree the year he and his brother and sister lived with us; The little boy who loved to camp and fish and was always needing his line untangled which I happily did for him; The little boy who held the Crawdad up to his face because he loved them so and it attached itself to his nose (We laughed and helped him.)

Then, I saw the young man saying I do to his lovely Bride who was also the sister of Steven's wife. Then there he was showing me his new baby and then another. I never got to see the third boy.

Michael had been fighting demons since his early 20s. That is when Schizophrenia usually attacks. The voices told him things and he lived inside his head but medication brought Michael back. He always saw the sun unless his medication was off or he didn't take it and then the world was dark and he did things that only his demons understood.

His wife could no longer stay with him and though they divorced she always stayed in very close contact. It was she who had to tell Steven.

Michael is Steven's and Sylvia's brother and Sylvester's son and now he was gone.

Thursday I went to Clarkston to see Mother and then go see Steven. I stopped and talked to Dad awhile and learn more. Whatever happened, pushed or jumped, Michael had fallen from his third floor Apartment balcony.

I went on up to Mom's and she smiled and was glad to see me. As far as she was concerned, I had not been there in a month of Sundays. She said, "Oh, I am so glad to see you. I dreamed you came because Michael died." I had brought her a Thinning Bar (Maple Bar). My brother, Norman, had teasingly called them that. I kinda figured she would need something, after all, Michael was her brother's son and as close to her as a son. I told her that it was so sad that Michael had died and she stopped mid bite. She had truly thought it was all a dream and so it was as if she were hearing it for the first time. I kinda counted on that to begin with and spent the rest of our visit comforting her.

As it turned out, the Care Center was having a BBQ that day. Billy came; Dad came; and Steven and his wife came. I made sure that Sylvester wasn't left alone upstairs before Steven got there and he was sitting with Mom. It was a wonderful BBQ and just what was needed.

Micheal's son, Shane wrote the Obituary. It was very nice. And now, we await Micheal's return from Spokane. Then Steven and Sylvia will make all the arrangements as Sylvester can't.

So, say a prayer for Stevie and Sylvia and Sylvester.

Christy